Signs

Spring is eminent

Karma

Hi Mom!  I look great don't I?

Won't be long now.....

Wow...do we have a lot of Squirrels! 

More bad karma coming from a friend.  This person seems to take every opportunity to challenge me on subjects I'm passionate about.  They do it in a nasty passive aggressive way.  I know this friend is hurting big time.  Job loss, potential career loss and a large weight gain.  I am trying my best to look the other way.  I don't do conflict well, but I'm sick of being so wimpy.  Being around my sons GF who is a young very confident women is teaching me that it's time I stood up for myself.  I am going to from now on.  I never look for trouble with anyone, but I am not going to be back down from my core beliefs either.  Two days from now I will be in CA.  Very excited to see my oldest son and spend some much need quality time with my hubby too!  We need this vacation badly.  I hope to see Elephant seals and a grey whale.  We will be staying right on the coast in Point Reyes National Seashore.

On the birding home front.  Flocks of ground feeding birds has swelled, and also my flock of cardinals can reach over 2 dozen birds some evenings. The migration is beguinning.  Spring is only 3 weeks away.  My excitement is building.  Both Black Squirrels were on the window feeder together yesterday morning.  They both look very healthy!  Hope the female has a successful first litter with more blacks in it! This morning there are at least a dozen in the yard.  Many sitting together eating.  Too cute for words, must get a picture to prove it! 

I watched a wonderful PBS film about Rachel Carson.  She is my hero.  I feel such a kinship for the passion she had for the natural world.  I need to re-read A Sense of Wonder before I leave for my trip.

The full moon is this afternoon at 3:26pm.  I went outside last night at 12:30 and looked up at it, really stunning.  The sky was clear and the stars were very bright.  We have storm rolling tonight, so there's a good chance it won't be visible tonight. 

My hiking buddy

Had an amazing 2 hour hike with Monty today.  Enjoyed the snow immensely because it could be gone when I return from CA. No wildlife or birds but lots of peace and serenity.

Rachels Home

Some day I am going to find this home. 

Montauk

We spent a wonderful weekend out at Montuak at a friends summer home.  We had snow the first night, and then wild winds the next two day.  The gusts were up to 50mph.  We walked on the beach multiple times, the force of nature always amazes me.  The winds were so strong it nearly took me off my feet.  While there I continued to keep my list of birds for the Great American Backyard Bird Count.  We had great views of ducks.  Common Loon, Ring-neck,  Brant, American Widgeon, Pintail, RB Merg, Common Merg, Hooded Merg, Surf Scoater, Eider, Canada Goose, Mallard, Buffle Head.  I  happened to see what I think was Goshawk.  I won't record it, but I'm pretty sure that is what came though the yard at 7am while I was outside with Monty.  Very different then a Coop. Large torpedio like body.

Great company, food and wine.  I am truly blessed in this life. It was a much needed weekend away where I was able to completely escape my mind and just be. 

I love my life

I have been incredibly blessed to spend the last 31 years of my life with an amazing man. He is one of a kind, the most loving generous person I've ever met.  Our adventures together have been many and we always have fun.  We share a tremendous  love of life.  Gratefully,  neither of us have tired of the grand adventure, we are always ready for the next road, to see where it takes us.  I am  so grateful that I  found my soul mate while I was  young, it was love at first sight, and it hasn't waned. 

Thank you stars for aligning us....this man has been my greatest blessing in this life. 

Chinese New Year

Yesterday was the Chinese New Year.  It is the year of the snake a animal near and dear to my heart.  As always with our family tradition, we had Take Out Chinese food for dinner.  For the first time in my life I got a Fortune Cookie that spoke to me. 

Snow!

We had a nice snow storm Friday into Saturday, Nemo.  It dumped around 10 inches on us here in Warwick.  We went out snow shoeing both Saturday and Sunday.  Simply beautiful out.  At my feeders we had a dozen Red-Wing Blackbirds and all the usual suspects.  Life is good! 

Happy!

Today is the very first time in close to a year that I woke up feeling unbridled joy and gratitude about simply being alive.  I can feel the sense of happiness all the way to my stomach, a feeling of giddy anticipation of life, that I thought was gone from me forever. Typically that is how I've felt for the last decade, until our lives fell apart, that feeling left me. I closed myself off from feeling anything. For close to ten months I've felt like I've been just existing, getting through each day.  I haven't felt like *ME* at all. Living like this has left me sad and depressed and wondering if this is all there is to life now, will I always feel so down, will I ever feel excitement and passion about my life again?  I never realized just how much I love planning and going on adventures until I got busy putting together  some vacations over the last few weeks.    I love knowing that we have adventures booked that include hiking, exploring and deep uninterrupted time in nature.  I thought after all that happened last year, the traveling part of my life would be on hold for many years to come, and as it turns out,  there is no better time then this year for a little travel before we both get busy working lots of hours with our new business, and before we start the huge task of building our new down sized empty nest home.  I am now beyond EXCITED for  this year to unfold!  We are headed to Montauk with cherished friends in another week, to the northern coast of CA in 3 weeks to visit our first baby, then at the end of March hubby is going with the middle two boys to GA for their annual dirt-bike trip, May brings us to our annual trip to Letchworth St Park, and in June we are going on an amazing 2 week trip out west with my mom and her hubby.  After that.....we work, work, work for our entire summer, which is fine with me as I don't enjoy going away in the summer, every place is always way too crowed.  In September we will get to camp on the Islands at Lake George with our oldest son, who started camping there with us 25 years ago.

What an amazing wonderful year I have ahead of me.  I am deeply, truly grateful for each day I am privileged to be here on earth.

My Childhood Hero

A friend posted on their facebook wall asking if your childhood hero has fallen from grace.  I responded...No. She died when I was a child.  Rachael Carson.  She was my idol, a environmentalist, writer and  nature lover. She wrote about what was to become of the earth with mans interference and disregard decades before anyone else dared to. She left us way too soon, but thankfully put her words into writing and published many books on the environment, so her voice could be heard for generations to come.  

In Rachel's own words:

I can remember no time, even in earliest childhood, when I didn't assume I was going to be a writer. Also, I can remember no time when I wasn't interested in the out-of-doors and the whole world of nature.

We still think in terms of conquest.  We still haven't become mature enough to think of ourselves as only a tiny part of a vast and incredible universe. 

But man is a part of nature and his war against nature is inevitably a war against himself. 

Now, I truly believe that we must come to terms with nature, and I think we are challenged as mankind has never been challenged before to prove our maturity and our mastery, not of nature, but of ourselves.

The more clearly we can focus our attention on the wonders and realities of the universe about us, the less taste we shall have for destruction.

After Silent Spring's impact, and just before her death at 56 from breast cancer, she wrote to a friend, 

The beauty of the living world I was trying to save has always been uppermost in my mind . That, and anger at the senseless, brutish things that were being done.
I have felt bound by a solemn obligation to do what I could. If I didn't at least try I could never be happy again in nature. But now I can believe that I have at least helped a little. It would be unrealistic to believe one book could bring a complete change."

It is a wholesome and necessary thing for us to turn again to the earth and in the contemplation of her beauties to know the sense of wonder and humility.

In a television interview, Carson stated that "man's endeavors to control nature by his powers to alter and to destroy would inevitably evolve into a war against himself, a war he would lose unless he came to terms with nature."

Wild creatures, like men, must have a place to live. As civilization creates cities, builds highways, and drains marshes, it takes away, little by little, the land that is suitable for wildlife. And as their space for living dwindles, the wildlife populations themselves decline. Wildlife refuges resist this trend by saving some areas from encroachment, and by preserving in them, or restoring where necessary, the conditions that wild things need in order to live.

1989 article

I copied this out of the book; The Power of Hope, Joy and Inner Peace by Bernie Siegel, MD.   I've kept it and read it, over and over again since 1989.  Seems to me that it is the only guidance you could ever need to have a happy life. 

How to Stay Well or Get Better;

1.  Do things that bring you a sense of fulfillment,  joy and purpose.  See your life as your own creation and strive to make it a good one.

2.  Pay close and loving attention to yourself, tuning into all your needs.  Take care of yourself, nourishing, supporting and encouraging yourself.

3.  Release alll negaive emotions, resentment, envy, fear, sadness, anger.  Express your feelings, don't hold onto them. Forgive yourself.

4.  Love yourself and love everyone else. Make loving the purpose and primary expression in your life.

6.  Create fun, loving, honest relationsips, allowing for the expression and fulfillment of neeeds for intimacy and security.  Try to heal wounds in past relationships.

7.  Make a positive cotrabution to your community through work or service that you value and enjoy.

8.  Make a commitment to health and well being and develop a belief in the possibility of total health.  Develop your own healing program drawing on the support and advice of experts with out becoming enslaved to thelm.

9.  Accept yourself and everything in your life as a oppurtunity for growth and learning.  Be grateful.  When you screw up forgive yourself, learn what you can from the experince and then move on.

10. Keep a sense of humor. 

CA

We are going to CA to visit our son in three weeks!  I am beyond excited.  We are staying in Inverness in a beautiful tiny cottage called Sea Ridge and also at Bishops Ranch for a couple of days. We are looking forward to spending quality time with our son, and doing lots of nature time. 

Ground Hog Day