Alone

Lay down in the field of tall grass and guess who comes along

My Cathedral~Gym & Psychiatrist

Where there is death, there is new life

My Friend

 Today I was super depressed as I headed out for a hike with my Monty.  I've missed a lot of days of hiking lately due to the lack of energy, doctors appointments and tests.  I know that skipping my nature time is never a good idea, the more days I skip,  the easier it is for me to end up in the toilet completely depressed.  Soon after entering the woods the layers of depression began to peal away.  It was amazing that the more time I spent in the woods, the happier I became.  I began to feel as though I was wrapped in a big blanket and could lay down on the ground and rest my weary body and soul.  I felt so completely at peace and that I'd come home.  Nature feels like the hug I long for, the one that comes with a loving being telling me that everything will be ok.  I can't get that feeling from anyone in my life.

There has been nothing easy about the last 5 weeks...NOTHING. And the odd thing about it all is you really begin to learn some important life lessons.  One thing that I've found out is that I really have no one besides my hubby who understands me, who knows how to support me in a time of crisis.  I know now that I've got to get good and steady on my own two feet because that is all I'm guaranteed  to have help to carry me though the rest of this life during times of crisis.  Some people are lucky to have family members who are there for them thick and thin,  I've not been that blessed.  Mine are too wrapped up in themselves to be able to give back what I've so freely given to them. I'm done with it.  I won't drain my own emotional energy for them again.  It has to be a two way street.

Today's hike was great.  A Red-bellied was feeding a hatchling as was a Pileated Woodpecker.  I had good views of both.  Great Crested Flycatchers and a Kingfisher added to the great bird that filled the forest.